One day when you finally get too tired to run
when your world is still and silent
I hope you remember all the hurt you caused
to me and the others
because you were a coward
The realisation that you were always running, never stopping,
because you were too afraid of looking into the mirror
Your form of escapism is no different from hers
she escaped into herself
but you were worse
Your false bravado covers your insecurities
Your letting go shielded you from the future pain you saw in your projected prophecies
It was not for anyone else’s benefit but yours
You were only protecting your fragile little heart
believing it was never enough to keep anyone as yours
So you go before they can do it to you
You pretend to be doing it for their own good
When they begged and cried and asked you to stay
You felt a sense of satisfaction and glee that made you go back for more
Digging your fingers into their fresh wounds whenever it was about to heal
Telling them you care, you do, and you make them bleed all over you
It goes on and on until their blood runs dry
and they leave for good
By then you would have already found your next victim
their ribs cracked right open, heart beating
bursting with untethered love as your new sustenance
While yours remain safe and walled up,
obscured with your lies and pretences
And you continue to run and run from yourself
fuelled by self-preservation and a narcissistic high
When the day comes when you can no longer run
I hope it all comes crashing down
the magnitude of your losses
and how privileged you were
to be loved by the ones you discarded
the ones who were true and unguarded
unlike the coward who trampled and disregarded
the damage caused to their hearts and souls
I hope your regrets overflows
